


Withered Petals

by mugongeki



Category: Saint Seiya, 聖闘士星矢: 冥王神話 | Saint Seiya: The Lost Canvas
Genre: Angst, Barely at least, Hurt No Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:48:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24119773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mugongeki/pseuds/mugongeki
Summary: Shion thought he was more or less healed from Albafica’s death. Obviously, no one could completely heal from losing a loved one; the feeling was always there. The pain was always there. Time, however, was able to make wounds more bearable. It was like withered flowers. At first, their fragrance is making you sick, seeming to fill up your entire body. But the more time passes, the less scent you can smell. Eventually, you put the withered flowers on your desk and look at them, remembering what was linked to them. Shion felt like his entire room was a storage of such flowers. Withered… Never forgotten.
Relationships: Aries Shion/Pisces Albafica
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13





	Withered Petals

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Shinren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinren/gifts).



> This work is dedicated to Shinren, the biggest Shionfica and Albafica fan in the world, and also my biggest muse.
> 
> She was also the first reader and editor of that work, so, stan Shionfica and stan Shinren thank you

Shion truly and honestly liked keeping himself busy.

First of all, because that was old habit from the past. Second of all, because time passed really quickly then. And third, because when he was busy, thoughts were usually not haunting him this much.

Not that the Grand Pope could be lazy, at all.

So his day usually looked like a lot of paper and strategy works, maintaining the young gold saints and keeping a careful eye on the Sanctuary. When he was going to sleep, it was more like a dawn than actual night. He didn’t consider it bothersome. If anything, it was convenient, his mind too busy to reminisce or regret.

Because there were many regrets within Shion’s heart, and many questions which answers were out of his reach. Who would guess that the one who held the biggest knowledge amongst the saints couldn’t find answers to his doubts, his worries and shadows of the past.

It wasn’t like Shion wanted to forget, not really. Some memories he held in his heart were painful, like a dagger stabbing his chest over and over again. But there were also those memories that made him smile; the sun shone brighter then, the laughter of children he heard from the courtyard was clearer than ever. 

Shion didn’t want to forget, but sometimes he wished he was not the one that had survived.

Usually, the painful memories, memories of blood, war and fragrance of withering roses were pushed so deep within himself that something had to trigger them for Shion to scratch on the old would. 

He tried to remember what was good. Tried to recall only the positive moments. Sometimes, when his day was really bad, it was the only thing that kept him going and smiling. He didn’t want to look grumpy and tired; children definitely didn’t like seeing him like this and Shion didn’t want to worry them.

His lips curved at his report, even though there was nothing funny in it. He liked to think Albafica would approve of his positive demeanor. There were times in which wearing this mask was tougher than usual, but Shion kept trying, and trying. He was telling himself that otherwise, Albafica would scold him. Besides, the Pisces Saint was really someone he admired, someone he looked up to.

It would be a lie to say Shion didn’t fall for Albafica’s beauty, but it definitely wasn’t the only thing he was enamored with. He was strong and smart. The closer they were getting, the more walls Albafica builded around himself were crumbling. Shion liked Albafica the most when they were alone. 

He could witness the smirk when he said something silly and Albafica judged him. He could hear his laughter and see eyes that brightened up whenever he decided to surprise him with a small gift, or dinner, or anything else. He loved spoiling Albafica and Albafica always spoiled him back.

Shion liked to be seen as someone strong. He was young, barely an adult, being seen through this perspective was rather humiliating to him. He liked to stand proud and tall, yet with Albafica… He wasn’t afraid to show his vulnerable side. Sometimes he was worried, sometimes he was tired. Sometimes cloths he was repairing were screaming so loud he looked for comfort and love. He was always getting it.

There was a long way until he could, obviously. 

Albafica was scared not only of touching others, but even of being too close to them. At first it was like a ticking bomb and heavens, how many times he got scolded! But as an Aries, Shion was really stubborn. Sometimes he would take small, cautious steps. Other times he was throwing himself at Albafica almost rudely - catching his hand, patting his shoulder, sitting right next to him. He was both patient and impatient, understanding and whining. The changes were small, but noticeable. Eventually Albafica didn’t scold him anymore when he was sitting too close. Then, he pretended to not notice how their hands brushed. When Shion confessed to him for the first time under the stars, that also marked their first hug and kiss. No matter how many centuries would pass, Shion never forgot it. He was never going to forget it, at all.

Albafica’s embrace was possibly the most comforting in the whole world. The Saint could seem distant and closed off, but his arms were the warmest place Shion has ever been to. When they wrapped around him, everything negative seemed to immediately melt away, leaving him happy, content, loved. It was strong, yet gentle, for that short while making him feel like the center of the universe.

Albafica was the center of Shion’s universe.

He has never even imagined that he could love someone as much as he loved that Pisces Saint. Sure thing, Shion experienced all emotions rather heavily; sadness, happiness, anger. But that love… When their eyes met for the first time, Shion was already sure he wanted to get closer to no one but that man. The wisdom that he has seen was immeasurable. But so was his sadness and loneliness. Since that time Shion took it as his ultimate goal to protect Albafica from everything bad in this world.

Don’t get him wrong. He didn’t think Albafica was incapable of protecting himself and fighting back, the very opposite to that. Yet Shion loved him _so much_. He wanted to shield him with his arms and bare chest always, at any time. He wanted to be by his side when the past was tormenting him. He wanted to wipe away his tears, rock him to sleep, play with his beautiful hair.

In short, Shion wanted Albafica whole, as he was.

He felt proud every time he noticed Albafica was opening up to him more, warming up to him more. He vowed to himself to never break his trust. He vowed to himself he would never let him suffer and yet… Promises are always easier to make than to keep. Shion could have said he tried really hard, but he didn’t. He knew he would lose with that man’s stubbornness no matter what. He could only watch him die.

“Grand Pope!”

He shook his head at these memories quickly. When Aphrodite entered his chamber, Shion greeted him with a warm, kind expression. Like everything was alright. Like he was never mourning.

“What is it that you need, Aphrodite?”

He put the pen away, nodding towards a chair close to him. Aphrodite shook his head, curly locks flying all over his face. He was 14 at that time, just recently got allowed on protecting the temple all by himself.

_Albafica, you would be so surprised. He’s so much different from you, but his potential is great. He would adore you._

“Grand Pope, do you have time to see my temple and my garden?”

He raised his eyebrow at that and chuckled quietly, in a manner in which resembled a father laughing at his excited child, endeared. Aphrodite took his duties very seriously. He also couldn’t wait to live in the Pisces Temple, so how could Shion possibly deny him?

“Of course.”

He nodded, then, and made sure all his papers were neatly folded; he was going to get to them later. Raising from his chair, he followed Albafica to the Pisces Temple. A year or two ago, the boy would still bounce excitedly. Now he was holding himself with pride and seriousness. Shion was amazed, and only a little sad. They were still children.

“I worked on that really hard!”

Aphrodite chirped and Shion shook his head. The boy spun around the moment they stepped inside and Shion felt like his entire blood left his body. 

How foolish of him was to think that Aphrodite would only clean the dust away and leave everything untouched. In fact, he changed everything.

During his time spent here with the previous Pisces Saint, Shion had gained the ability to notice when something was misplaced only by taking a quick glance at the temple. He could walk around blindfolded and still not bump into anything. Yet couldn’t recognize the twelfth house right now. There were fresh flowers in the couple of spots and those were _not_ Albafica’s favorite flowers. The decorations, everything was simply not in Albafica’s style.  
Thankfully, Aphrodite didn’t notice anything wrong. He kept chirping, showing him different objects and then proceeded to run towards the garden.

For a long couple of seconds, Shion considered simply turning away and leaving, but Aphrodite was so happy… He couldn’t have been selfish, he was never selfish. So, gulping the bile that formed in his throat, he walked towards the garden.

Shion thought he was more or less healed from Albafica’s death. Obviously, no one could completely heal from losing a loved one; the feeling was always there. The pain was always there. Time, however, was able to make wounds more bearable. It was like withered flowers. At first, their fragrance is making you sick, seeming to fill up your entire body. But the more time passes, the less scent you can smell. Eventually, you put the withered flowers on your desk and look at them, remembering what was linked to them. Shion felt like his entire room was a storage of such flowers. Withered… Never forgotten.

He looked around the garden and thankfully he was standing right next to a pillar, otherwise he would end up face planting into the field full of thorny roses.

_The roses that **weren't** never there before. _

To Shion, Albafica’s temple and this garden were like his shrine. Time stopped there. Since the Aries made sure no ruckus would happen there, it always looked exactly like Albafica left it.

As if, in fact, he had never left it.

The sight that greeted him was sickening. He had to hold himself back to not tell Aphrodite it wasn’t how it was supposed to be. These roses didn’t belong here. Their colors were tangled, unmatched. And what is that? That hydrangea has never been here before, too! The little circle of daisies… Why in the world were they next to roses? They were small and fragile.

Albafica always put daisies a little bit more on the back; he still clearly remembered how once they sat there, late in the afternoon when the sun wasn’t this bright anymore. Shion had his head on Albafica’s lap and they stayed there in silence, simply enjoying each other’s presence. Albafica run his fingers through Shion’s tangled, sweaty from work hair and the Aries thought this is how he wanted to stay his entire life. 

He looked around almost furiously, trying to spot lilacs, flowers he knew Albafica liked the most. Why didn't Aphrodite plant those? 

His head was throbbing with a dull pain. Suddenly everything seemed not right; the sun didn’t shine on those flowers as it should, the shade wasn’t there to protect those the most fragile ones. 

He tried to tell himself his behavior was unacceptable, but his heart couldn’t, it really couldn’t bear this pain.

Shion knew Albafica had died a long time ago. He was the one to witness that, to carry his still warm, but lifeless body back to the Pisces Temple. He stayed with him until Sage didn’t have to literally throw him out of the room and prepare for burial.

In this place, however, Albafica was still alive. It was like his spirit was still there, like a little blue butterfly he sometimes saw, dancing through the flowers. Some times that butterfly sat on his shoulder or his finger, tickling his skin. Shion always let himself get fooled by the illusion of Albafica still being there with him during those times.

What would happen to the butterfly now? 

Albafica was dead. The garden was dead.

“Grand Pope?”

He heard a small, frightened voice and tried to put the pain aside. He found himself almost crouching down on the ground, eyes filled with horror and unshed tears.

“Aphrodite, I'll come back later. It looks beautiful.”

He managed to say, pretending his voice wasn’t shaking at all.

He left the garden much quicker than he had entered it.

Thankfully that afternoon no one wanted anything from him. There were no knocks on his door, aside from Saga who he told he was busy and asked for some peace. 

That afternoon, Shion’s only company was salty tears.

If someone has ever asked him what kind of wounds he suffered the most from, Shion without a doubt would say it was longing. All kinds of physical wounds could never ever stand next to those he was bearing with his heart.

The last time he'd sobbed like this was precisely the day of Albafica’s death, when he kept the pisces' dead body on his lap and rocked him, praying to all the Gods he knew to give him back his love. He thought he could never go keep going without Albafica’s comforting presence by his side. He thought his life finished along with Albafica’s, and even though it wasn’t exactly the truth, some part of him definitely left this world then, too. 

Albafica knew more about him than even Dohko it. Albafica was there to hug his nightmares away. Albafica was there to scold him when he was working too hard, was there to make him laugh, was there to make love with him. Shion never dared to think about the future, but how magical would that future be with his lover by his side.

He went through 200 years with a stoic expression, pretending the wound was long since healed.

He gripped on his robes when another sob shook his body, like he wanted to rip his chest apart. Sometimes he thought his heart wasn’t there anymore; Albafica took it with himself. So many times he promised himself he would stay in this world to bear not only Albafica's, but all their fallen comrades' legacy.

Right now, though, he once again felt like that boy who had lost the love of his life.

He wished he could have died in that Holy War. He wished he didn’t need to go through centuries with the same pain, same longing. He wished Albafica was there. 

An old river of tears flowed and Shion turned his head towards the opened window. Suddenly the smell of roses made him sick, his insides twisting and tangling. 

_It wasn’t their place._

.  
.  
.

When he woke up many hours later after falling asleep on the floor, exhausted from crying, a blue butterfly was settled on his hand. It waved its wings and circled around, before settling on his palm again.

“Don’t scold me.”

Time can never stay still.


End file.
